Monday, July 17, 2006

Unhealthy Guidelines

Unhealthy Guidelines
VH Melville

I decided to put out some unhealthy guidelines for people who want to stay unhealthy, unhappy and Yo-Yo. This all tongue and cheek but I am also using it as a teaching tool. You can share your own unhealthy guidelines as well or rather things you used to do and now realize are unhealthy.
1. Force yourself to eat food you hate instead of slowly introducing new foods. Tell yourself you don’t have the will power when this fails.
2. Join a marathon the first day of your diet even if you’ve never exercised in years.
3. Berate yourself for every diet mistake made.
4. Tell yourself ”Being thin will make all your problems go away. “
5. Stop eating all the foods you like because your on “Diet mode now” yell at people for eating a cupcake in front of you.
6. Just give up if you have a gain. The scale is the only thing to measure success.
7. Eat unhealthy fad diets because you want the weight to come back now. You will force yourself.
8. Don’t allow yourself to be pampered.
9. Throw away your measuring cups you can guess serving sizes just fine.
10. Buy every “diet” pill. Advertisers never lie. Okay Even I can’t right that with straight face.
11. Make people feel bad because they don’t want to eat a piece of cake for whatever reason. If you’re eating it everyone must eat it.
12. Don’t drink your water.
13. Exercise should be the same thing day in and day out.
14. Calories on vacations and holidays don’t count.
15. Don’t journal off leftovers from the kids. Sharing destroys calories.
16. If it’s a salad it’s got to be healthy even if the dressing has a half cup of mayo.
17. If a product says light or low carb the product is light and low carb and not just the same product in smaller servings. Yes a lot of companies were repackaging high cal and high carb foods as low carb and light by making the serving sizes small.
18. You can go off your diet the moment you hit goal. You might gain all your weight back but you’ll have fun doing it.


Anonymous thinkoffthefat said...

Hi Iportion, thanks for the v&c. Please quit reading my mind. You surely picked up a few of my excuses right out of my head just as I was about to whine about this past month, how I have not had any success. You're a woman after my heart when you use lists. I list everything in my life daily, it is such an accumulative habit. Actually, it works well for me when I get right down to the business of trying to lose weight. It also is a good crutch for my memory, when it decides to be selective with what it wants to remember. This is a great site. Bless you.

12:55 AM  
Blogger iportion said...

You’re welcome.

Just trying your best and realizing what your excuses are means you are a success.

2:21 AM  
Blogger CactusFreek said...

Hi :o)
Well gee. Someone should tell all overweight teenage girls that advice. Being teens, they'll do the opposite and think they are rebels at the same time! lol

6:29 AM  
Blogger Candee said...

"Throw away your measuring cups you can guess serving sizes just fine." Ahhhhh...ok, ok I need to start measuring my portions AGAIN! Great Post!

8:47 AM  
Blogger Jen said...

Fabulous list! I'll make sure to NOT do any of that stuff :)

12:04 PM  

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